I feel kinda weird today. I feel tired and unmotivated. I don’t like days like this. I want to draw so bad but I can’t think of anything to draw. And seriously I tried drawing and painting a bunch of things, but they all end up in the trash. I feel down, but I don’t know why.
This drawing was made after a bunch of papers were already thrown and crumpled because I feel so…. I don’t know… FRUSTRATED? I based this drawing from a beautiful photo of a girl I saw in Pinterest. Trust me, she’s prettier than what I drew.
I finished a painting, too.. I saw a painting tutorial on YouTube and followed it.. Here’s what I did.
I feel disappointed with myself because I can’t still make my own art. Especially in painting. Am I doing something wrong? I think following painting tutorials degrades my creativity, but develops it at the same time. They’ll not post that tutorial if I can’t copy/follow it, right? I’m only practicing. And once I get a grip of paint or once I learn how to deal with painting, I’ll make my own. And besides.. I already did some paintings that I didn’t copy.. they may not be as good as the ones I followed on YouTube.. but still.. I like them..
BUT I CAN’T STOP FEELING LIKE I AM DOING SOMETHING WRONG! WHAT THE F#CK IS HAPPENING?!
CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME… AM I DOING SOMETHING WRONG?? WHAT DO YOU THINK IS HAPPENING TO ME?
I guess my depression is taking over me again. I’ll be fine. I need chocolates.